The “Mind, Body, and Spirit” philosophy is not only my personal mantra, but Resolution’s Healthcare’s logo and way of life. The difference for me and our company is we preach it all the time. We are not saying it just to sound good for public relations, it’s part of our mental health and recovery beliefs. As I stated it is also part of my personal journey in life. Until you have worked in all three spheres you should never say, “nothing I do works”. Until you have committed 100% to improving your lives, you cannot say “nothing I do works”.
I cannot tell you all how many times I have heard clients in treatment, and in life, say, “nothing I do helps with my depression”, or “anxiety”, or “weight loss”, or “emptiness”. Upon closer inspection through timelines, groups, and interviews it didn’t take long to see that most clients did not really work enough on themselves to improve their mind, body, and spirit. Maybe they started to work in one or two of the spheres, but then quit after a short time.
So where am I going with this blog. Simple, you need to wake up and smell the cappuccino. Stop spewing words just to make excuses or make yourselves feel better. If your lives are not going according to your plan, change your plan. If you don’t change the plan, then please stop saying “nothing I do works” and at least recognize you are not committed to change.
It gets more difficult as we age to change our lives. I know that from my personal journey. It wasn’t easy at 36 to change my life and start over, but I did, and so can you. I have had clients in their 70’s and 80’s that have changed their plans. It’s never too late! We often get set in our ways or are too deep in responsibilities to think we can change. Then we tend to make excuses as to why we can’t change. I’ve heard most of them and know it’s just not accurate. It may be painful and difficult to change directions, but it can be done. Do not just rationalize that it’s the way it must be. Do not ever stop trying!
The perfect example is one that occurred in one of my “Trauma and Addictions” groups. A client stated that too many people depended on him and that he had too many responsibilities. Well, he walked right into my response when I asked, “And how are taking care of those responsibilities going while sitting here at my treatment center?” You see, the superman complex of you saving everyone around you while you crash and burn doesn’t really play well. He realized that everyone he was referring to was out in the world functioning without him. A hard reality, but one that is true. If you think the world around you can’t survive without you, then wake up and realize you need to help yourselves first before you can take care of those around you.
In all the treatment centers I have worked I have always implemented groups and a client culture that reflects the essence of the mind, body, and spirit. As in life, the more balanced and centered you are, the more apt you all are to have healthier lives. The more off centered you are, the more you will find yourself always reacting to the day’s, months, and year’s events. This is not just a substance rehab or recovery philosophy, it’s a philosophy for all to embrace. The goal is to work all three spheres and try to keep them balanced. This goal is a lifetime one and will always need re-adjusting throughout our lives.
Let’s look at each sphere individually and expand on what I’m preaching here:
1. Mind – This area is where we need to start improving our mindset. Educating ourselves on better ways to process events in our lives. We need to explore our belief systems and how we came about thinking the way we do. We need to challenge our distorted beliefs that were built on false pretenses. We need to challenge our shoulda, whoulda, couldas about past events and recognize that second guessing them will just weigh you down in the present. We need to recognize this is where our insecurities lie that may relate back to our childhoods and the way we were raised or past unresolved traumatic events. For example, if you were raised constantly hearing how “stupid”, or how “you are no good”, then that’s what you will believe until you challenge that belief and learn that comments like that were used to either demean you or control you.
The mind is a critical part for healing when past unresolved trauma is present. I realize that many victims of past trauma may need clinical assistance to help them resolve these traumas. If you are in therapy for past trauma, take time to review this blog with your therapists.
The mind is where our views on our lives are centered. If you are experiencing symptoms such as anger, anxiety, depression, PTSD, eating and sleeping problems, this is where you need to work on to re-align the distorted beliefs you may have adopted over the years. This can also be addressed in therapy.
2. Body – This area speaks for itself. What are you doing to keep yourselves in shape physically. “I don’t have time” isn’t a reason, it is an excuse. Everyone has time to do something in a 24-hour day. Make time and muster the discipline necessary to stick with it. I’m not saying you need to run a marathon; I’m saying do something that helps you feel better physically. There is more than enough research showing how physical exercise improves your mental health. I know it can be difficult as you age to keep doing something to stay in shape. I surely know that doing nothing is never going to cut it. Even a bad exercise day is better than no exercise.
3. Spirit – This is the area where people often get confused. It’s not just about religion. It’s about your inner spirit and what you do to spend time exploring your spirituality. It can be any eastern or western religion or thought processes. It’s not just about God or whether you believe or don’t believe. It’s about finding time in your day to reflect on the day’s events and to process those events. It’s about resolving the day’s issues and bringing them to a close if possible. I am not very religious, nor do I meditate, but I spend time reflecting on my day’s decisions and processing how to do better tomorrow. So, find some practice that can feed your inner soul.
The above summary of the mind, body, spirit journey is just some of the things that fall under each category. I probably could write volumes on each one, but for the sake of brevity I just wanted to share some of the things that we address in each area.
Now, I’m far from perfect, and I surely have issues I still need to work on. This is not about being perfect, it’s about recognizing that wanting a better and more positive life takes the same effort as keeping your negative and unhealthy life intact. You can spend your days focusing on your past and how life has been bad or unfair to you or you can work to resolve your past and turn the past weaknesses to present strengths.
The purpose of this blog was to help you all see that it takes balancing your mind, body, and spirit to improve your lives. It’s about recognizing that keeping the three spheres balanced is a lifelong journey. It’s also about recognizing “Nothing I do works” will not cut it. If you choose not to improve your lives, then at least accept that fact and stop making excuses. The excuses help other people keep their excuses intact. That alone will at least be an accurate statement.
A juggler can only juggle when focused on the balance of all the objects he’s using. The clearest picture of the necessary balancing is a gymnast on the balance beam. If they start tilting one way, they must compensate to maintain the balance. If they fall off, they get right back on. So, the next time you find yourselves saying “Nothing I do works”, please remember some of things I have discussed and good luck with keeping your lives in balance!
Mind, Body, Spirit…Balance!
Vinnie Strunolo, CEO, CCO, LMFT
